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DBT Emotion-Regulation Skill

Problem Solving

Problem Solving is a structured way to identify a changeable problem, clarify what you want to accomplish, generate possible solutions, take action, and evaluate what happens.

What Is Problem Solving?

Some difficult emotions are responses to real problems. In those situations, the most useful response may not be trying to change the emotion. It may be changing the situation that is creating it.

Problem Solving is a DBT emotion-regulation skill for situations where there is an actual problem and at least some part of that problem is within your ability to change.

The process helps turn a broad or emotionally loaded situation into a series of concrete decisions:

What exactly is the problem? What do I want to change? What are my options? Which option is most likely to work? What happened when I tried it?

Try This Now

Define One Problem You Can Act On

  1. Think of one situation that is bothering you.
  2. Describe the problem in one or two factual sentences.
  3. Ask: “What part of this situation can I actually influence?”
  4. Identify one realistic outcome you would like.
  5. Write down at least three possible actions you could take.
  6. Choose the most workable option and identify the first concrete step.

You do not have to solve the entire situation at once. A useful first step is still problem solving.

When to Use Problem Solving

When There Is a Real Problem

Problem Solving works best when the difficulty is based on something that is actually happening.

For example:

  • A bill is overdue
  • A deadline is approaching
  • A conflict needs to be addressed
  • A task is not getting completed
  • You need information before making a decision

If the problem is based mainly on an assumption or prediction, Check the Facts may be useful first.

When Something Can Be Changed

Ask whether there is any action you can reasonably take that might improve the situation.

Even if you cannot control the entire problem, there may be one part you can influence.

If nothing about the situation can currently be changed, acceptance or distress-tolerance skills may be more appropriate.

When the Emotion Fits the Facts

If an emotion fits the facts, it may be signaling that something important needs attention.

For example, anxiety about an actual deadline may indicate that planning or action is needed.

Anger about a repeated boundary violation may indicate that a conversation or boundary-setting step is needed.

In these situations, reducing the emotion without addressing the problem may leave the source unchanged.

How to Solve a Problem

1. Describe the Problem

Define the problem as specifically and factually as possible.

Instead of:

“Everything at work is a disaster.”

try:

“I have two assignments due Friday and I have not started either one.”

A specific problem is easier to work with than a broad judgment.

2. Check the Facts

Separate what you know from assumptions or predictions.

Ask:

  • What is actually happening?
  • What evidence do I have?
  • What am I assuming?
  • Is there important information I do not have?

Make sure you are solving the problem that exists, not a problem created entirely by an interpretation.

3. Identify What You Want to Change

Clarify your goal.

Ask:

“If this problem improved, what would be different?”

Keep the goal realistic and within your influence.

Instead of:

“I want everyone to stop being difficult.”

try:

“I want to clearly communicate what I need and decide what I will do if the problem continues.”

4. Brainstorm Possible Solutions

Generate several possible responses before deciding which one is best.

During brainstorming, avoid rejecting ideas too quickly.

Possible solutions might include:

  • Taking direct action
  • Asking someone for help
  • Gathering more information
  • Changing the timing
  • Breaking the problem into smaller parts
  • Setting a boundary
  • Changing part of your routine
  • Trying a different approach

Aim for several options so the first idea does not automatically become the only idea.

5. Evaluate the Options

Consider the likely advantages and disadvantages of each option.

Ask:

  • Is this realistic?
  • Is it within my control?
  • What might it improve?
  • What problems might it create?
  • What resources would it require?
  • Does it fit my larger goals and values?

You are looking for a workable solution, not necessarily a perfect one.

6. Choose a Solution

Select the option, or combination of options, most likely to move you toward your goal.

If several options seem reasonable, choose one to test rather than remaining stuck trying to identify the perfect answer.

7. Make an Action Plan

Turn the solution into specific actions.

Identify:

  • What you will do
  • What the first step is
  • When you will do it
  • What you need beforehand
  • Whether anyone else needs to be involved

The clearer the next step is, the easier it is to begin.

8. Take Action

Carry out the plan.

If the task feels too large, identify the smallest useful action you can take.

Planning without action can eventually become another form of avoidance.

9. Evaluate the Result

After you try the solution, look at what happened.

Ask:

  • Did the situation improve?
  • What worked?
  • What did not work?
  • Did I learn anything new?
  • Do I need another solution?

If the first attempt did not work, that does not mean problem solving failed.

Use what you learned to revise the plan and try again.

Example

“I Keep Putting Off an Important Task”

Problem:

“I have an important task due Friday. I keep avoiding it, and the deadline is getting closer.”

Goal:

“Make enough progress that the task can be completed by Friday.”

Possible solutions:

  • Work on it for 20 minutes tonight
  • Break it into smaller sections
  • Ask someone to help clarify one confusing part
  • Schedule a specific work period tomorrow
  • Remove distractions while working

Chosen plan:

“Tonight I will spend 20 minutes outlining the task. Tomorrow at 10:00 I will work on the first section for 45 minutes.”

Evaluation:

“The outline made the task feel more manageable. The 45-minute block was useful, so I will schedule another one.”

Common Obstacles to Problem Solving

The Problem Is Too Broad

Problems such as:

“My life is a mess.”

are too broad to solve directly.

Break the situation into smaller problems:

  • What specifically is not working?
  • Which problem is most urgent?
  • Which problem can I influence?
Trying to Solve Something Outside Your Control

You may be able to influence another person's behavior, but you generally cannot control it.

Instead of:

“How do I make them change?”

ask:

“What can I communicate, request, change, or decide on my side of this situation?”

If nothing can be changed, Radical Acceptance may be more useful than continued problem solving.

Looking for the Perfect Solution

Many real problems do not have a perfect answer.

Several choices may involve tradeoffs.

Ask which option is:

  • Realistic
  • Effective enough
  • Consistent with your priorities
  • Worth trying
Brainstorming and Evaluating at the Same Time

If every idea is immediately rejected, you may struggle to generate alternatives.

Try separating the steps:

First: generate options.

Then: evaluate them.

Spending Too Long Planning

Planning can feel productive even after enough information is available to act.

Ask:

“Do I actually need more information, or do I need to try something?”

Sometimes the next piece of information comes from testing a reasonable solution.

Strong Emotion Is Making It Hard to Think

Problem solving may be difficult when emotional arousal is extremely high.

Use a distress-tolerance or grounding skill first if necessary.

Then return to the problem once you can think more clearly.

Questions That Can Help

  • What exactly is the problem?
  • What facts do I know?
  • What part of this is within my control?
  • What outcome am I trying to create?
  • What are at least three possible responses?
  • What are the likely consequences of each option?
  • What would I advise someone else to try?
  • What information am I missing?
  • What is the smallest useful next step?
  • How will I know whether my solution worked?

When Problem Solving May Not Be the Next Step

When There Is No Problem to Solve

Sometimes distress comes from an inaccurate interpretation rather than a changeable problem.

In that case, use Check the Facts before developing a solution.

When Reality Cannot Be Changed

Some situations cannot be changed now, or have already happened and cannot be undone.

Continuing to search for a solution may become a way of fighting reality.

Radical Acceptance or another acceptance-based skill may fit better.

When You Need to Regulate First

If you are too overwhelmed to evaluate options clearly, first reduce the immediate intensity.

You might use:

  • TIPP
  • Grounding
  • Breathing
  • Distraction
  • A temporary Time-Out

Return to Problem Solving afterward.

Related Skills

  • Check the Facts — determining whether there is an actual problem to address.
  • Brainstorming Solutions — generating multiple possible responses before choosing one.
  • Evaluate Options — comparing possible solutions and their likely consequences.
  • Cost-Benefit Analysis — examining the advantages and disadvantages of different choices.
  • Identify the Next Small Step — turning a solution into a manageable action.
  • Coping Ahead — rehearsing your chosen response before a predictable difficult situation.
  • Radical Acceptance — responding when the part of reality causing distress cannot currently be changed.

Tips for Practice

  • Define the problem specifically before trying to solve it.
  • Separate facts from assumptions.
  • Focus on what is actually within your influence.
  • Generate several options before choosing one.
  • Look for a workable solution rather than a perfect one.
  • Turn the solution into a concrete first step.
  • Evaluate what happened after taking action.
  • Treat an unsuccessful attempt as information you can use to revise the plan.
  • If the situation cannot be changed, shift from problem solving toward acceptance or coping.